Hetalia Purim
by seikatsu-chan
Summary: Happy Purim! I'm forcing a bunch of Hetalia characters to perform a Purim play! Yay! Rated T for people getting hung.


**Hetalia!Purim**

**Ari: Hi! Happy Purim! It's Purim today, and to celebrate, I'm forcing everyone to ac out the play for the story of Esther! Yay!**

**Here's the cast: **

**King Ahashueres: America/Alfred F. Jones**

**Queen Vashti: Canada/Matthew Williams**

**Mordochai: England/Arthur Kirkland**

**Esther: Israel/Idit Levi**

**Haman: Prussia/Gilbert Beilshmidt**

**Butler 1: Lithuania**

**I am so, so sorry! I fit them due to personality, not because I think Prussia is evil! He's awesome!**

**Idit: No he is not! Don't even try to believe that because you know it's not true!**

**Ari: Okay… Anyway, I don't own the Book of Esther or Hetalia! Nobody except for Israel belongs to me!**

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><p>Long, long ago in a country called Hetalia, there was a king named America and a beautiful queen Canada. They lived happily in the royal palace until one fateful day.<p>

On that day, King America was having a party. He decided that he wanted Canada, who was a magnificent dancer, to dance for him and his friends.

"Lithuania, bring out Canada so he can dance for us!" America screamed to his faithful butler.

As Lithuania scuttled out of the room to find Canada, America chatted with his friends. They had a merry time and drank lots of wine. All of them wanted to see Queen Canada dance.

Then, Lithuania came back into the room. "Sire, Queen Canada does not want to come dance."

The king was outraged. Why would his wife not listen to him? "Excuse me for a minute, dudes," he huffed, leaving the room.

He came upon Canada, who was standing in their bedrooms with his as crossed. "How many times have I told you that I will not dance for you and your friends?" he asked.

The king was shocked, that was the first time he'd ever seen Canada angry. "Come on dude, you're a great dancer! Why won't you dance for me and my friends?" America asked. He was really confused. Canada had never refused him before.

"I don't want to dance, America! Don't you get it? I never liked dancing!" Canada's face was red with rage. America took the hint (Canada shoved him out the door) and went back to his party without him, much to his embarrassment.

The problem was, an evil man named Prussia was he kings top advisor. He told America that if he let Canada get away with this unpunished, then he would come to regret it because couples wouldn't listen to each other. America was forced to banish Canada from the country.

The next day, a poor Jewish man named England (A/N: I'm so, so sorry! I just couldn't think of anyone else for the part!) was walking down the street. He heard the king's name and the word kill in the same sentence, so he couldn't help but listen in.

He immediately recognized the men talking as France and Spain, two of Prussia's henchmen.

Spain said, "Can you believe that we're really going to be able to do this mi amigo? I mean, killing the king is a big job."

"Je sois desole, my friend. We have to finish this job though. The king must be assassinated tomorrow before the procession. He must die, even though I don't want him to either."

England couldn't believe his ears. They were going to kill King America! He had to notify the police immediately. Well, Police Chief Germany didn't listen, so England went to the castle. He told America, who told him he was paranoid. Then, there was the shot of a gun and there was a bullet hole next to America's head.

The palace guards caught and arrested France and Spain, proving England right. England was thanked. He had save the king's life.

Then, America began to miss his beloved wife. Because he could not get her back, he issued that the land be searched for people to be his new queen. The land was searched far and wide.

When England found out about this, he immediately told his niece, Israel. She was Jewish and one of the most beautiful girls in the region. She had long, wavy, black hair that she wore in a braid down her back and skin the color of milky coffee. She wanted to be America's new queen.

Israel auditioned along with many other girls from all around the country. Israel managed to beat them all and win the heart of King America. They were married the day after she won.

Then, America did something weird, he made a giant statue of himself. He parked it in the center of town. He commanded everyone to how down to the statue, as everyone was supposed to bow to the king and the statue was essentially a hologram of King America.

England and the other Jews would not now down to this statue and this got Prussia angry. You see, he was an anti-Semite. He hated Jews. This gave him even more of a reason to hang them all, and because he was the king's head advisor, he could convince the king of almost anything if given proof.

So, Prussia convinced America that all the Jews had to be hung for not bowing to his statue. Though America did not like this, there was solid proof behind it, so what could he do? All the Jews were to be hung on the 13th day of the month.

When England found out, he became angry and confused. He went straight to Israel and told her the bad news.

"Israel, your husband, King America, is going to hang us all!"

Israel had heard nothing of this before. "Really? Haman is a bit narcissistic, but I don't think he would-"

"Israel, would I ever lie to you?"

"Probably not."

"You need to notify the king!"

"But I'll be hanged if I talk to him without being talked to first..."

"Can't you figure out a way where he asks you to talk? Isn't there a time when that happens?"

"Oh! I can invite America and Prussia to dinner!"

Israel ran off to prepare. She invited Prussia and America to dinner. It was a splendid feast, with lots of delicious food that everyone loved.

In the middle of dinner, happy and drinking wine, America talked to Esther. "Esther, is there anything I can do to make your stay here better; maybe a wish of yours that I can grant? You can have anything in my kingdom."

"My petition and my request is this: If the king regards me with favor and if it pleases the king to grant my petition and fulfill my request, let the king and Prussia come tomorrow to the banquet I will prepare for them. Then I will answer the king's question."

America said he would definitely come. Prussia, on the other hand, was overjoyed! He had been asked to dine with the king and queen two nights in a row! He must be getting a promotion.

Drunk on pride, Prussia went back to the king's council. America was looking through his records. He decided he was going to honor England for saving his life. So he asked Prussia what to do.

"Well," Prussia responded off of the pride that came with the dinner, "You should dress him in your finest robes and parade him around the city and have everybody watch. Have Lithuania walk in front of him and say, "This is the man that King America wishes to honor!"" Prussia thought that with all that was happening, he would be the one being honored.

So, the next day England was paraded around the city in king America's finest robes on the back of a white horse with Prussia in front of him and all the people cheering.

Prussia was furious. He was supposed to be the one who was honored! That Jew England stole it from him! How dare he? He decided then that he'd build gallows specifically for hanging England and the other Jews.

Again, America and Prussia dined with Israel. Israel chose then to tell the king about Prussia and his plans to kill all of the Jews. Then, she told him that she was a Jew. When King America was still getting over the shock, Lithuania came in and told America about the gallows specifically meant for England that Prussia had made. America was furious and made it so that Prussia was hung in those very same gallows.

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><p><strong>Prussia: Wait, you never told me that the Awesome me gets hung! Why'd you kill me?<strong>

**Ari: Sorry, but your personality fit so well! And I played Haman tonight in a Purim play! DoctorWhotaliaandtheOlympians was even in Esther. If it makes you feel better, I got hung too!**

**Prussia: But you're not awesome!**

**Israel: Shut up! You two are taking up valuable air! Anyway, please R&R. Thank you!**


End file.
